THE PERFECT DAY -  HER
     
8:45   Wake up to hugs and kisses
9:00   5lbs lighter on the scale
9:30   Light Breakfast
11:00  Sunbathe
12:30  Lunch with best friend at outdoor cafe 
1:45   Shopping
2:30   Run into ex boyfriends/husbands - notice he's gained 30 lbs 
3:00   Facial, massage, nap
7:30   Candlelight dinner for two and dancing 
10:00  Make love
11:30  Pillow talk in his big strong arms
     
THE PERFECT DAY - HIM
     
6:45          Alarm.
7:00-7:30     Shower and massage.
7:30-7:45     Blowjob.
7:45-8:15     Massive dump while reading USA Today sports section. 
8:15          Limo arrives, Stoli Bloody Marys.
8:30          Butler Aviation, O'Hare Field, Lear Jet to Augusta, 
              Georgia.
9:30          Front nine holes, Augusta National Golf Club. 
11:30-12:30   Lunch - 2 dozen oysters, 3 Heinekens. 
12:30-12:45   Blowjob.
12:45-2:30    Back nine holes, Augusta National Golf Club.
2:30          Limo to Augusta Airport, Bombay Sapphire Martini. 
3:30-6:15     Nassau, Bahamas, Afternoon fishing with all female
              crew (topless). Catch 1249 lb. Blue Marlin. Grilled
              tuna and steamed lobster appetizers, six Heinekens, nap.
6:15-6:30     Blowjob.
6:30          Lear Jet return flight, total body massage in transit. 
7:30          Shit, shower, shave.
8:00-9:00     Watch CNN Live coverage of Bill Clinton's resignation.
              Hillary and Al Gore are indicted in the same scandal 
              (which involves graphic pictures and large farm animals).
9:00-10:00    Dinner at Ritz Carlton, Oysters Casino, 20 oz. Filet 
              mignons (rare), Gorgonzola salad, Fettuchini Alfredo, 
              Chateau Lafite Rothschild 1963 (magnum), creme brulet,     
              Louis XIV Cognac, Cohiba Lancero.
10:30-11:30   Sex with 3 women.
11:30-12:00   Whirlpool, steam and massage.  Women quietly get 
              dressed, hail cab and leave.
Midnight      Sleep