Three dogs were in a cage at the city pound: A Pit Bull, a German
Shepherd and a Great Dane.  The Pit Bull told the others "I was
eating my dinner and my owner's two year old niece tried to grab my
food, so I ripped out her throat.  Now they are going to put me to 
sleep."
  
The German Shepherd said "I chewed up my master' shoes yesterday
and now they are going to put me to sleep."

The Great Dane said "My master is a beautiful twenty two year old
woman.  The other day she came out of the shower and bent over in
front of me, so I mounted her and did my thing."

"So are you in here to be put to sleep too?" asked the others.

"No, I'm here to have my nails clipped!"