A small Oklahoma Wild Animal Park had acquired a very rare species of
gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla became very horny, and
difficult to handle.  Upon examination, the park veterinarian
determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat.  To make matters worse, there
were no male gorillas of the species available.

While reflecting on their problem, the park administrators noticed Ed, a
part time redneck intern, responsible for cleaning the animals' cages.
Ed, like most rednecks, had little sense, but possessed ample ability
to satisfy a female of ANY species. So, the park administrators thought
they might have a solution.

Ed was approached with a proposition; would he be willing to have sex
with the gorilla for $500. Ed showed some interest, but said he would 
have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, Ed 
announced that he would accept their offer, but only under three 
conditions.  "First," he said. "I don't want to have to kiss her."

"Secondly, you must never tell anyone about this."
The park administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they
asked what was his third condition.  "Well," said Ed.....
"You've gotta give me another week to come up with the five hundred
bucks......"