A sports reporter for the Chicago Sun-Times is walking through Grant Park. when he notices two boys playing football. Out of nowhere, a pit bull attacks one of the boys and begins mauling him. The other boy, having no choice, finds a large branch and clubs the dog over the head with it, killing the dog. The shocked reporter rushes over to the two boys, and after finding out they were all right, offers to write a story about the heroic little boy. Since the reporter was a sports reporter, he decided to give his headline a sports slant: "Young Chicago Bears Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal" The little boy looks at the headline and says, "Sorry mister, but I'm not a Bears fan." The reporter stops writing and says, "Oh, well since you were playing football and we're in Chicago, I just assumed you were a Bears fan." And so the reporter begins a new headline: "Little Minnesota Vikings Fan Fends Off Mad Dog Attack" The little boy looks at the headline and shakes his head. "I'm not a Vikings fan either, mister," says the boy. The reporter erases his headline again and says, "Gee, I thought every kid in the Midwest was either a Bears or Vikings fan. To save time, why don't you just tell me what team you do root for." The little boy smiles and says, "I'm a Green Bay Packers fan." The reporter nods and begins his final headline: "Little Cheesehead Bastard Murders Beloved Family Pet"